when McGonagall finds out that Ginny is pregnant, and that the Weasley and Potter bloodlines will converge, she marks on her calender the day the child will turn 11 and that is the day she retires
do you ever think about the judges for the triwizard tournament trying to figure out who to kidnap for the second task
like they’re all just sitting in dumbledore’s office and karkaroff goes “well word on the street says that krum has a crush on that granger girl”
"damn," says dumbledore, "I wanted harry to rescue her. well, what about the delightful miss chang?"
"no," says bagman, "we’ve got her down for diggory"
"stop sinking my ships," says dumbledore
How to tell if it was a gunshot or fireworks: gunshots don’t echo, fireworks do.
thaNK YOU SO MUCH
the fact that anyone might commonly need to know this terrifies me
clearly you’re not from america
If your name is on one of these I just wanna let you know your parents are basic bitches with no creativity
Sounds like someone’s sad they couldn’t find their name on a coke bottle
the waiter at olive garden has been grating my cheese for 6 hours now waiting for me to say when. customers are screaming. three people have died. I will not yield.
"black friday" more like the day where merchandise is sold for what it’s actually worth
you don’t need my permission
JUST FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS DON’T LET NOTHIN’ HOLD YOU BACK BRO